Blog Posts

What does sarcasm say about a person?

2/1/2017

If you use sarcasm it might be a good idea to ask yourself,

What are you trying to accomplish with your communication?
What kind of relationship do you want?
Are you striving to be funny at the expense of others?
Or do you want to build relationships of trust and love?
Do you care how other people feel?
Or are you only interested in entertaining yourself?

Here’s what I found when I Googled ‘Sarcasm’. Sarcastic people often see teasing as tough love and believe people should be able to handle it. They also think saying, “just kidding” after a sarcastic remark makes it OK, even if it hurts. They usually see themselves as funny people, even if they are the only ones laughing. In reality, sarcastic people usually have a fear problem. They are usually battling either a fear of not being good enough (the fear of failure) or the fear of being taken from (the fear of loss). They need to step back and figure out why they need to be sarcastic.

If you’re interested in learning more about sarcasm and how it affects relationships, here’s a good article to read.
http://www.lifeway.com/Article/marriage-family-relationships-Sarcasm-The-verbal-enemy-at-the-gate

May you choose a life that brings joy to both you and those around you

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What would a life changing resolution do for you?

1/4/2017

You may or may not be into New Year Resolutions. Either way, if you hope that 2017 will be a great an uplifting year, isn’t likely that if you speak gently, forgive freely, and love relentlessly, it will deliver in spades?

Maybe just a little note like this on your bathroom mirror or someplace that you look at frequently will help.

SPEAK GENTLY
FORGIVE FREELY
LOVE RELENTLY

May your 2017 be filled with joy and be the best one ever!

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WHAT IS THE TRUE ESSENCE OF CHRISTMAS?

12/21/2016

What is the true essence of Christmas? The quick answer is ‘The Birth of Christ’. While that is true, it seems like it becomes much more relevant when we live out ‘The Attitude of Christ’ by the example He gave us through His life on Earth…

Give up one's very self and think only of others
Forgive one another
Listen empathically to understand each other
Value and appreciate each other
Look for the good in each other
Accept differences with others
If necessary, agree to disagree with grace

If we do these things, isn’t it likely that we will experience the true meaning of Christmas resulting in peace, joy, and goodwill to men?

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ARE YOU INSANE?

12/6/2016

We humans are interesting people. Why is it that many times when we do things that don’t end up with good results, we continue to do those things the same way? And the results continue to be bad. Here are a few examples…

Worry about things that we have no control over
Practice things over and over with techniques that don’t work
Play the lottery. While you may win a little, the system is set up for you to lose
Jumping to conclusions only to find out that you didn’t know the whole story
Use the word ‘but’ and as soon as you do it, the other person becomes defensive
Bad choices about things that you know aren’t good but you do them anyway
Wait until the last minute and then you’re always late
Continue to saw down a tree without sharpening the saw
And there are many more things that would fall into this category

All of these things cause extra stress in our lives and rob joy and productivity from us and those around us. I suppose that’s why Old Albert said that this is a form of insanity. Do you agree?

Take a minute to think about some areas in your life that are causing some stress. What are some things that just aren’t working well? What can you do to prevent them from happening again in the future? Wouldn’t it be the best use of your time and will bring more sanity and joy to your life as well as those around you?

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How can you be assured of a Happy Thanksgiving?

11/22/2016

Many times Thanksgiving involves getting together with family and in-laws. Sometimes it turns out to be a great time of getting together and catching up on life’s happenings. On the other hand, occasionally if there are some trying relationships, it can be difficult resulting in anything but a time of thanksgiving.

Can you believe that you can have great impact on how your Thanksgiving Day turns out? Since Thanksgiving was founded on thankfulness of the harvest, try to remember, “What you sow is what you reap.”

So this year do your best to sow Kindness, Gentleness, Patience, and Thankfulness with those that you gather with. If you do, isn’t it likely that there will be a high probability of reaping what you sow?

Why not do your best by sowing these fruits and experience great JOY! And I hope you all have a very HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

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Have you ever struggled with resentment?

11/8/2016

Is it reasonable to assume that one time or another someone has ‘wronged’ you? What feeling did you immediately feel when that happened? My guess is that it may have caused you to hold resentment toward that person.

Take a minute and think right now. Are you currently harboring resentment or bitterness toward anybody? If so, who is the real loser in this situation? It’s you isn’t it?

So what choice do you have? How about the choice to forgive them even if they don’t deserve it? As the Bible instructs us, “Forgive and you too will be forgiven.” In addition, when you don’t forgive, don’t you feel out of sync and in bondage?

Hanging onto resentment is giving someone power to make you feel bad. Choose not to and when you make this choice, take note of the freedom and joy that enters your life.

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DO YOU HAVE THE COURAGE TO LEAD?

10/18/2016

In his book “Next Generation Leader”, Andy Stanley suggests that ‘Courage’ is one of the greatest tools in the toolbox of a good leader. Webster says that courage is “the ability to do something that you know is difficult or dangerous. Many of us may interpret this to mean that we need to boldly move into difficult or treacherous activities.

While that may be true in some cases, Stanley cites Three Expressions of Courage that look a little different than traditional thinking.

THREE EXPRESSIONS OF COURAGE

The courage to say ‘No’. Doesn’t it almost seem counterintuitive that saying ‘No’ takes courage? But think about it, aren’t there many things in the world that we live in that can take us down a dark path? That said, saying ‘No’ when the masses are saying ‘yes’ to bad choices truly does take courage, doesn’t it? In addition, wouldn’t learning to say ‘No’ to good things also give you the freedom to say ‘yes’ to the best things?

The courage to face reality. Many times aren’t we tempted to get drawn in to thinking and dwelling on things like “If only such and such would have happened”, “I sure wish he would change his mind”, or “I wish the economy wouldn’t be so bad?” As a result doesn’t that many times result in negatively affecting our ability to lead others in a positive way? Doesn’t it make sense for the strong person or leader to focus on “the way things are” rather than “the way we wish they would be”? Then time and energy can be spent on productive things that are relevant.

The courage to dream. One thing that is very restrictive when we live in the “If only” world, is that it keeps us from dreaming what can be. Doesn’t it take courage to dream about the future and bright solutions when many people are locked in to believing ‘it can’t be done?’ And doesn’t dreaming give us more freedom to hope for a better future? One of the strongest influences on finding purpose and joy is having hope for the future. Choose to dream with courage!

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What are things that kill great leadership?

10/4/2016

GREAT LEADERS ARE TYPICALLY ARE NOT INTERESTED IN HAVING THEIR OWN WAY. RATHER THEY WANT THE BEST WAY.

Many people hold an oversimplified idea about what leadership means. Some think it’s just a matter of guiding others to complete a task. Others confuse it with motivation. In truth, leadership is a complex blend of competencies and capabilities. It means communicating and empathizing, directing and modeling, teaching and mentoring—and, above all, trusting and serving.

There are a few qualities, though, that can kill even strong leadership. Here are few of the deadliest…

Not listening
Revenge
Arrogance
Disrespect
Ingratitude
Favoritism
Poor communication
Conceit
Rigidity
Shortsightedness

Most of us do struggle with one or more of these things. Stop and think about your own leadership at home, at work, or in life in general. Do you struggle with any of these things? If so, begin by first taking responsibility for leading yourself by having the humility to get feedback from people you trust. Then as you begin making improvements, take note of how much better you become in connecting with your followers. Why not bring more purpose and joy to yourself and those that you influence?

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ARE YOU AWARE OF THE POWER OF A SMILE?

9/20/2016

When you interact with another person, would you typically rather see them have a smile on their face or a frown? While there might be an occasional situational exception, wouldn’t we all rather face a person that has a smile on their face?

If you agree with this, wouldn’t the same principle translate to each of us as we communicate with other people also? If you need some reasons why it would be good for us to smile more frequently, here are some of the top ones to consider…

You’re more attractive!
It’s magnetic. It attracts people to you!
You can CHANGE THE WORLD! A smile is contagious!
Helps you feel better and others too!
Helps you build better relationships at home and in life!
Enhances your business!
And perhaps the best reason… you’ll grow old sexily!😀

Why not make a conscious decision to develop a habit of smiling regularly and begin experiencing more joy in your life?

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How does criticism affect your relationships?

9/7/2016

Have you thought much about why being critical can ruin relationships? If you find yourself criticizing others, it might be a good idea to put your feet in the shoes of the receiver of the criticism and ask yourself this question, “How do I feel when someone criticizes me?” If you are like the greatest majority of people, you will quickly get defensive, wouldn’t you?

Sometimes we try to justify criticism as being constructive criticism. But is it really constructive? If the other person feels attacked, how constructive will it really be?

There is another approach that might be more effective if you really care about the well-being of another. Start by focusing on all that is good about them. It will help both you and them. Then if they trust you, ask them if they would be interested in an observation that you have that help them succeed even more than they already are. If they say ‘yes’, they will have invited you in. Doesn’t it make sense that when a person invites feedback in that they are much more likely to take kindly to it.

On the other hand, if you are on the receiving end of criticism, you too have choices. Just realize that when they are criticizing, they are telling you more about themselves than they are you. If they make some valid points, consider them and act accordingly. If not, realize that it is simply their opinion and disregard it. Never give another person the power to rob your joy.

Your choices will either enhance your peace and joy or rob it from you. Why not choose wisely when it comes to criticism.

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