Have you thought much about why being critical can ruin relationships? If you find yourself criticizing others, it might be a good idea to put your feet in the shoes of the receiver of the criticism and ask yourself this question, “How do I feel when someone criticizes me?” If you are like the greatest majority of people, you will quickly get defensive, wouldn’t you?
Sometimes we try to justify criticism as being constructive criticism. But is it really constructive? If the other person feels attacked, how constructive will it really be?
There is another approach that might be more effective if you really care about the well-being of another. Start by focusing on all that is good about them. It will help both you and them. Then if they trust you, ask them if they would be interested in an observation that you have that help them succeed even more than they already are. If they say ‘yes’, they will have invited you in. Doesn’t it make sense that when a person invites feedback in that they are much more likely to take kindly to it.
On the other hand, if you are on the receiving end of criticism, you too have choices. Just realize that when they are criticizing, they are telling you more about themselves than they are you. If they make some valid points, consider them and act accordingly. If not, realize that it is simply their opinion and disregard it. Never give another person the power to rob your joy.
Your choices will either enhance your peace and joy or rob it from you. Why not choose wisely when it comes to criticism.
Sometimes we try to justify criticism as being constructive criticism. But is it really constructive? If the other person feels attacked, how constructive will it really be?
There is another approach that might be more effective if you really care about the well-being of another. Start by focusing on all that is good about them. It will help both you and them. Then if they trust you, ask them if they would be interested in an observation that you have that help them succeed even more than they already are. If they say ‘yes’, they will have invited you in. Doesn’t it make sense that when a person invites feedback in that they are much more likely to take kindly to it.
On the other hand, if you are on the receiving end of criticism, you too have choices. Just realize that when they are criticizing, they are telling you more about themselves than they are you. If they make some valid points, consider them and act accordingly. If not, realize that it is simply their opinion and disregard it. Never give another person the power to rob your joy.
Your choices will either enhance your peace and joy or rob it from you. Why not choose wisely when it comes to criticism.
RSS Feed
