Isn’t it much more effective to solve problems when we simply talk about what happened rather than whose fault it was? Then when each party takes responsibility for their part, the solutions typically begin appearing. And if I am the first to take responsibility, how much easier is it for the other party to do the same?
The sign of maturity is to learn to take responsibility for yourself and your actions. In the end, in some instances when the other party doesn’t want to play ball, it may require you to just forgive the other party even though you think they may not deserve it, and drop the grudge. No use losing twice. Along with that come peace, joy, and a free conscience.